The Laws of Khaki Revealed

On this Tidbit Tuesday, I'd like to begin with a great quote I found from Mary Pickford, that Hollywood legend who had a way with words: "You may have a fresh start any moment you choose, for this thing that we call "failure" is not the falling down, but the staying down..."

As for some items I think you might find of interest:

* Tuck in your shirt and stand up straight: Many men seem to be confused about what to wear to work when the dress code is casual (why else would anyone think Crocs were OK??), but Esquire magazine does a terrific job in its latest issue to illuminate more males about what is appropriate. Advice ranges from the fact that you should never wear a beret, to the the idea that any man who wears a shirt with a saying on it "has neither the intelligence to form a cogent opinion nor the good sense to keep it to himself." This is the kind of article to tuck into your sock drawer and study every night before bedtime. An example: "There are worse things in the world than being known as the guy who always wears a blue button-down. Like being known as the guy who looks like he just rolled out of bed or the guy who always smells a little funny. If you're going to settle on a look, get it right."

*Sorry, I've got to wash my hair: Next time you ask a co-worker to hang out after work or on the weekend, don't take it personally if you get some lame excuse. Seems most of us would rather ditch the colleagues and hang out with people we well, don't work with. A new studyby the University of Michigan found that only 30 percent of employees have a close confidant at work, down from nearly half in 1985.
On average, U.S. workers spend time outside of work with less than half of the co-workers with whom they regularly interact on the job, compared to 74 percent for Polish workers and 78 percent for Indian workers.

*Make sure the spinach is out of your teeth: The growing popularity of video resumes, coupled with the desire to network directly with employers, has been put into a new product called VisualCV. The Web site allows job seekers to build online resumes with videos, work samples, reference letters and other media, in addition to the standard work and education information. Links to the pages can be sent to prospective employers and shared with firms that have pages on the site.

* I'd like dental, too: The presidential race has given voice to a lot of concerns in our country today, and one of the most prevalent has to be health insurance. Especially concerned are young people just entering the workforce, often with crushing student loan debt, who are worried about not being offered some kind of health insurance plan from an employer. That's backed up by a recent Robert Half International survey that found that benefits such as healthcare insurance are nearly as popular as salary for today’s job seekers. Thirty-seven percent of CFOs interviewed said offering higher compensation than competitors is the most effective incentive for attracting accounting professionals, while 33 percent of respondents cited benefits as the top draw, a 31-point increase from 2003.




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The Power of Quiet

Recently, I had the opportunity to be in a soundproof room. We're talking padded, carpeted walls with absolutely no sound -- nothing -- penetrating the walls. I was in there by myself, and the minute I was left alone I let out a sigh. It was like all the air left my body, and my posture immediately relaxed into the chair.

I was in that room by myself for about 10 minutes, and it was absolutely remarkable. Seriously, I cannot recall any time in my life that there was absolute quiet. There was nothing for me to do but just sit there and listen to...nothing.

It felt like a gift. Something given to me unexpectedly in the face of an often chaotic life where I try and meet the demands of my professional and personal life on a minute-by-minute basis.

I've thought many times about that soundless room in the last few weeks, as my stress level often peaks and I search for ways to relieve it -- reading, listening to soft music, exercising, visiting with family. But I've got to say, I think very longingly of my quiet room. It's as if that room said to me: "It's OK. Turn everything off. Quiet yourself and just be."

This week I noticed a couple of posts by blogger Tiffany Monhollon and I was struck by the anxiety and confusion she felt as she tried to figure out the issues facing her and GenY, and why it all seemed so hard. I immediately remembered how I felt starting out in the world, and the same stress of trying to keep my personal and professional life on track, while trying to make sense of the world. I told her that generations before her had faced the same dilemma called life, and sometimes we all need to just remember what we have in this life...not what we don't have.

But one thing I didn't tell her was that I do believe the constant barrage of information and just noise hitting the younger generation is something older workers didn't face in their early careers. We were given a chance to just think, to walk out of our workplace and not resume the job until we re-entered the next day. We weren't expected to be on call to a computer and pager and cell phone.

In the latest issue of Esquire magazine, an acoustic ecologist says that in 1984 there were some 21 spots in Washington state where there were at least 15 minutes during which no man-made sounds could be heard. Today, there are only three.

The writer of the story used this information in a story about how he had always been quite the talker, but spent some time recently simply not speaking. He found the less he talked, the easier it was to shut things out. "Used right," he said, "silence communicates trust. It's like carrying a holstered gun....It's not dangerous; it's in the holster. But people notice. It can't kill anyone, but they see what you are carrying. Silence makes you the sheriff."

So, here's a new challenge for all of us. Shut it off. All of it. Try to eliminate every hum and rattle of your world for at least 15 minutes every week. Try to talk less and just be.

Then, let me know if you find what you've been looking for...




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